One of the reasons I take breaks from Facebook and Instagram is simple: the whining makes me tired. Not just other people’s whining, my own. Yes, venting has a place. Yes, truth repeated can matter. But too often it feels like a cage full of people shouting about the bars instead of bending them. Outrage without motion is just another form of captivity.
This morning I stopped complaining and did the work. I researched what can actually be done right now. The list is long. Real. Actionable. And it made one thing painfully clear: We do not need nicer Democrats. We need bad-ass Democrats.
Part of the problem, one we need to say out loud, is that being up against a liar is brutal. Liars don’t argue facts. They don’t explain policy. They simply say what their people want to hear, over and over, with a straight face. And their people eat it up like candy: sweet, addictive, and rotting the teeth of democracy in real time.
Truth can destroy lies but only when it’s wielded with strength. Truth whispered politely while lies are shouted through bullhorns does not win. Truth needs backbone. It needs repetition. It needs courage. And yes—it needs us to stop being so damn nice.
We need leaders who don’t confuse “being good” with being effective. We need people willing to fight evil with intelligence, with the law, and when necessary with force. Not performative outrage. Not endless fundraising emails. Not speeches designed to trend. We need people who move the ground beneath the enemy’s feet.
I keep hearing Democrats say they don’t want George Conway because he used to be a Republican. That thinking is timid and self-defeating. Conway is a Democrat now because he had the guts not to be a lemming. That’s not a liability, that’s proof of character.
We need people exactly like him. We need people exactly like Gavin Newsom. People who don’t speak just to be heard but to move mountains. People who understand power, aren’t afraid of it, and know how to use it without flinching.
We don’t need to like the people we elect. This is not a book club or a brunch table. But we do need to respect them. And right now, I am struggling to respect a Congress that talks endlessly while democracy is being methodically tested by people who lie without shame and play to win every single time.
So here’s the pivot, mine included:
Less whining. More strategy. Less politeness in the face of cruelty. More backbone. Less noise. More action.
We need to stop circling the problem and start saving democracy in measurable ways: one letter, one postcard, one phone call, one donation at a time.